Samuel Alito Just Made a Huge Announcement About His Potential Retirement

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He’s not leaving

Justice Samuel Alito channeled his inner Jordan Belfort to declare he’s sticking around, causing much heartache throughout liberal America. You can hear the collective groans. There was increased speculation about the future plans for one of the conservative wing’s most vocal voices, especially since National Public Radio posted a piece about his retirement on the final day of Supreme Court opinions in June. He’s told the Wall Street Journal he’s here to stay for another term:

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Yes, NPR took down the story and posted a retraction, but the story behind NPR’s epic foul-up was as unreal and sloppy as its supposed unbiased journalism. Nina Totenberg was again the face of this calamity, saying she misheard an announcement, but then that story turned out to be untrue. For goodness sake, call the Public Information Office, guys:

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And now NPR looks like total idiots. 

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